TRAVELERS GUIDE TO LATIN

Abiit, excessit, evasit, erupit - He has left, absconded, escaped and disappeared

Abyssus abyssum invocat - Hell calls hell; one mistep leads to another

Ad eundum quo nemo ante iit - To boldly go where no man has gone before

Animadvertistine, ubicumque stes, fumum recta in faciem ferri? - (At a barbeque) Ever noticed how wherever you stand, the smoke goes right into your face?

Aspice, officio fungeris sine spe honoris amplioris - Face it, you're stuck in a dead end job

Brevior saltare cum deformibus mulieribus est vita - Life is too short to dance with ugly women

Caro putridas es! - You're dead meat

Carpe Cerevisi - Seize the beer!

Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam - I have a catapult. Give me all your money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head

Certe, toto, sentio nos in kansate non iam adesse - You know, Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore

Cogito sumere potum alterum - I think I'll have another drink

Credidi me felem vidisse! - I tought I taw a puddy tat!

Credo nos in fluctu eodem esse - I think we're on the same wavelength

Dic mihi solum facta, domina - Just the facts, ma'am

Duc, sequere, aut de via decede - Lead, follow, or get out of the way

Eheu, litteras istas reperire non possum - Unfortunately, I can't find those particular documents

Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre? - Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?

Fabricati diem - Make my day

Fac ut vivas - Get a life

Feles mala! cur cista non uteris? stramentum novum in ea posui - Bad kitty! Why don't you use the cat box? I put new litter in it

Forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit - Perhaps someday we will look back upon these things with joy

Heu! Tintinnuntius meus sonat! - Darn! There goes my beeper!

Hodie mihi, cras tibi - Today for me, tomorrow for you

Hostis hvmani generis - Enemy of the human race

Humum mandere - To bite the dust

Id imperfectum manet dum confectum erit - It ain't over until it's over

Illius me paenitet, dux - Sorry about that, chief

In dentibus anticis frustrum magnum spiniciae habes - You have a big piece of spinach in your front teeth

Isto pensitaris? - You get paid for this crap?

Ita erat quando hic adveni - It was that way when I got here

Lege atque lacrima - Read 'em and weep

Machina improba! Vel mihi ede potum vel mihi redde nummos meos! - You infernal machine! Give me a beverage or give me my money back!

Mater tua criceta fuit, et pater tuo redoluit bacarum sambucus - Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries

Monstra mihi pecuniam! - Show me the money!

Moratorium - A delay

Nescio quid dicas - I don't know what you're talking about

Nihil ad rem - Nothing to do with the point

Nihil tam munitum quod non expugnari pecunia possit - No fort is so strong that it cannot be taken with money. (Cicero)

Nil actum credens dum quid superesset agendum - Thinking nothing done, while anything was yet to do

Noli nothis permittere te terere - Donít let the bastards get you down

Non erravi perniciose! - I did not commit a fatal error!

Non Gradus Anus Rodentum! - Not Worth A Rats Ass!

Non placet - it does not please

Non prosequitur - He does not proceed

Nonne de novo eboraco venis? - You're from New York, aren't you?

Periculum in mora - There is danger in delay. (Livy)

Perscriptio in manibus tabellariorum est - The check is in the mail

Pistrix! Pistrix! - Shark! Shark!

Pluralitas non est ponenda sine neccesitate - Entities should not be multiplied unnecessarily

Postatem obscuri lateris nescitis - You do not know the power of the dark side

Promoveatur ut amoveatur - Let him be promoted to get him out of the way

Purgamentum init, exit purgamentum - Garbage in, garbage out

Quad nesciunt eos non interficiet - What they don't know won't kill them

Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari? - How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Quid agis, medice? - What's up, Doc?

Re vera, cara mea, mea nil refert - Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn

Res melius evinissent cum coca - Things go better with Coke

Semper letteris mandate - Always get it in writing!

Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare - I think some people in togas are plotting against me

Si fractum non sit, noli id reficere - If it ain't broke, don't fix it

Si hoc legere scis nimium eruditionis habes - Essentially it says, 'if you can read this, you're overeducated.'

Sona si latine loqueris - Honk if you speak Latin

Stercus accidit - Shit happens

Tam diu minime visu! - Long time, no see!

Tintinnuntius meus sonat! - There goes my beeper!

Tum podem extulit horridulum - You are talking shit

Uberrimae fidei - Of the utmost good faith

Ubi revera (Ubi re vera) - When, in reality

Valui ad satanam in computatrum meum